April 2004
I almost can say thanks to the ones who used to bully me at school in the old days. Thanks to them I have created such a self estheem that I am almost in-distructable. Because I am revalidating almost 3 years now to get the person I want to be and thanks to them I keep going on to become the person I used to be. 
I am now taking care of our household like cooking, doing the dishes and washing only the ironing I leave lying for Coby because she likes doing it. And when preparing the food I started eating again last Christmas. I need the exercise to be able to swallow. And of course all the food is going into your longs when you never eat!
I eat at my own risk and the doctors are not happy about it but they know that I have made that decision. AND I AM STILL ALIVE!!!!
I still do not drink , because the thin substance keeps on getting into my lungs so I take my fluids through my catheter. I do not take any risk, people at the hospital showed me that getting your fluids by catheter is possible! So every day I enjoy my tea and coffee now, and wine is also nice! THE SKY IS THE LIMIT!
You can see that everything is almost like it used to be. And yes, I still am sitting in a wheelchair but I keep on believing in the idea that I will walk again, daah.

love, Marjan